“Tri-ing” Again
Stephen has a few Ironman races under his belt, but it’s been a number of years ago now. Fast forward past one broken collarbone, kidney stones, Covid, and a divorce—he’s starting over. I have done several running races from 5ks to marathons and a few triathlons (longest was an Olympic distance), but that was many years ago. Stephen always intended to get back to it, but I thought I was done.
In fact, as soon as it was clear we wanted to be in each other’s lives for the long run, he started saying, “When we do an Ironman…”. I humored him for a while, not correcting him, but wondering what I had done to give him the impression I was remotely interested in such an absurd idea. Finally, after he had made this presumptive statement for about the fourth time, I piped up.
“We are not doing an Ironman. You can do an Ironman and I will gladly support you, but this is not a we thing.”
“Oh, ok,” he responded, unperturbed.
Glad we cleared that up, I thought.
But. I learned a little something about Stephen recently when I asked him how he felt while we were dating when he hinted that he was interested in spending the rest of his life with me and I stubbornly announced to him that I wasn’t sure I wanted to get married again. I knew marriage was important to him and I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with him too, but I was still feeling nervous about making the big commitment again. I thought I broke his heart. I thought he was disappointed. But his recent answer to how that had made him felt—
“I knew you would change your mind.”
LOL. His quiet confidence is one of the things I love most about him.
But respectfully, he did change, “when we do an Ironman” to, “when I do an Ironman.”
In October 2022, we traveled to Kona for the Ironman World Championships. A good friend of Stephen’s was racing, having qualified by doing the required 15 Ironman races if you can’t qualify by time. This friend started doing Ironman races because of Stephen’s influence, so being there to support him was important to Stephen.
We got up early to see the swimmers head out into the ocean. We were at the finish line when Chelsea Sodaro, the women’s winner, crossed the finish line, falling into the embrace of her husband and one-year-old daughter. She looked superhuman as she powered through the last 100 yards, torch bearers trying to stay ahead of her. Something stirred inside me. It was hot and sticky, but we kept watching. We watched more elite athletes finish. We watched Chris Nikic, the first person with Down’s Syndrome to do an Ironman, finish. We watched everyday people, like you and me, finish. We watched his friend, finish. Stephen took me to the Ironman tent, bought me a hat. That something stirring inside me got louder and louder as the day wore on.
Before we left Hawaii, I said, “Ok, maybe we could do an Ironman.” Before I could change my mind, Stephen had us signed up for a race.
We started training for the Arizona Ironman 2023 in February 2023, me somewhat sheepishly and Stephen with the excitement of a kid on Christmas. This is our journey.
At the end of the journey, I hope to be able to answer “yes” to the following questions—
Can I do it? (I generally, and probably a little naively, believe I can do anything I put my mind to, but this?)
Without dying? (Seriously.)
Can I maintain my sanity and balance while doing it?
Can I still rock working full time, being a mom and wife, and doing all the things that I need to do every day including writing a blog about it all?
Can I do it while eating in a mentally balanced and healthy way?
Can I maintain or lose weight? (Ironically, with higher intensity training like this, you can gain weight and that was my experience with marathon training.)
Can I have fun doing it?
Kona World Championship 2022